Life is Confuzzling me!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Though not horribly so...

So I officially have NO IDEA what's going on in my life. except that tomorrow I'm leaving for Canmore to visit my brothers. But as for moving out...I have no idea. I was going to in the new year, then mom said that she might be spending four or five days out of the week in Edmonton when the new year started. So I might just be able to live at home fully undisturbed by her. I suppose we'll just have to wait and see after the holidays.

But, on a much much MUCH lighter side, I'm doing sound for GREASE!!!!!! We're doing Grease as our school play this year and I get to do all the sound stuff!! YAY!!! I'm excited. My dreads have made it somewhat impossible to be a part of the acting (how many rastas were there in the fifties?) but seeing as the old sound guy is playing guitar with the pit band, I get to take his place up in the booth. Hurray!! I just hope I do as well as he does. He's sooo good at sound.

And, another upside of being in the tech booth, I'll be *mostly* alone with this guy that I really like. He's doing lights. He's amazing at them. And he plays guitar. And he has a mohawk. And overall amazing style. And he has so many amazing opinions on all things political and environmental. Like Commu-anarchy. Which is exactly what my political thoughts have been since before I even moved to Sylvan and met him. And he's really nice. And funny. And I just keep going on, so maybe I should stop...

Yeah. But I do really like him and I'm soooo glad that I get this amazing opportunity to get to know him. you don't get much better than being stuck in a little box together. XD

But,I have to go eat breakfast, so. Peace and Love and Happiness in a thousands tons to all of you!!!!! =D

So, my life has taken an interesting turn....

Yeah, last night my mom kicked me out of the house, so I'm hopefully moving out before monday. So, I probably won't be able to post very much for quite a long time. Oh well, it's not so bad. hahaha I haven't exactly been posting very much lately anyways. whatever.

On a lighter note, I'm in the one acts festival again. right now we're doing our in house session for just Sylvan Lake people. we've done two shows and tonight is our last. It should be great. I get to be a crazy kleptomaniac. It's good.

But, I have to go to the library with my dad, so I'll leave you to your own devices for a little while.

Peace and Love!!!!

All of my love to all of you at once!!!LOVE LOVE LOVE!!!!

First off, my most superficial note, if still quite a happy one. I got a kitty!! his name is Simon Ezra Fox and I got him on Wednesday. He's white with orange splotches and he's really adorable. And little. But, carrying on.

so last night I had the single greatest Merge of my life. it was soooo intense. Merge, for anyone that doesn't know it, is a gathering of the youth groups of several churches in Sylvan lake and about sylvan in other towns. anyways, we started off with some worship songs and they were as intense as usual. I sang loud loud LOUD in my harmonies (I very rarely sing the words 'cause I'm not christian so they don't really pertain to me much). But I was harmonizing and it was good. Then the speaker, Jacki, went up and told us about some of her life and some of the experiences that brought her closer to her god. It was a pretty intense talk, I gotta say.

At the end she called the band back up to do a little background music while she called people up to be prayed for. Now, her speech had been about sexual abuse and other such incredibly intense things, so the first people she called up were others who had been sexually abused. That right there made it intense in itself, let alone the fact that the band played the PERFECT song to go along with it. The first line of the chorus was 'Let it go". But there wasn't a lot of singing so I was harmonizing with some serious soprano the WHOLE TIME. LOUD. loud enough that everyone could hear me over the music. it was intense.

Then I let all the emotions in the building run through me and I completely opened myself up to the True Source and channeled as much love as i physically could. And when the music ended i sat down in front of the stage and did some meditation...then i started laughing...which in turn led to me crying my eyes out with the pure joy of Love. Laughing and smiling at everyone and crying and overall just giving off as many good vibes as I could.
And when I finally stood up first thing I did was walk over to a guy I have never met in my life, give him a hug and tell him what an amazing person he is and that I truly love him. well, this was how the conversation went:

Me: Hi, I'm Cuppy...I really want to give you a hug.
Him: Umm, okay...*we hug*
Me: Thank you. Thank you so much.
Him: For what?
Me: For existing! You are truly amazing. You're a wonderful person.
Him: Thank you. that really means a lot.
Me: It's true. I love you. Have a good night. *I walk away*

It was good. Then i spent the next little while giving hugs to as many people as i could and telling them that i love them. I was reduced to tears again when i gave hugs to Kirsten and Chelsea and i couldn't quite articulate the fact that I love them both sooooo much. So, overall, it was the best night of my life so far. And it helped me to take some notice of a few abstract ideas that i hadn't seen before. Which is so good. I'll try and see if i can explain them...

1. I finally realized that I have friends in Sylvan Lake who truly love me. This was a really Really REALLY good thing to notice.
2. I re-noticed all the beauty of the world and how much I love everything on it.
3. I found out the best way to cry is to just fill yourself with Love and laugh a little. The tears will come. And they will be tears of absolute Joy.
4. I noticed how much i need to help the world in any way i possibly can, although that's been a realization in the coming for the past week.

So, yeah, this whole week has been pretty dang intense. On Wednesday I went to the Get Real program at the middle school here and that was Fully intense. There was about twenty or so grade eleven and ten students who hung out with the grade eights for the day. At first we just did some trust games and get-to-know-you-better stuff and just got comfortable with everyone in the room. Then, just before lunch, we split off into small groups of six or seven people: One teen leader, one adult and four grade eights. Or so. some had more, some less. My group was six people. During lunch we had to draw a picture of our ideal school. Well, what we really did was write down all the cool things that would be in our ideal school. It was cool. We came up with a lot of epic stuff. Then, after lunch, we did this thing called Cross the Line. I don't know how many of you have heard of it, so for those who haven't, here's what it is:

Everyone stood on one side of the gym and Lisa, one of the people organizing the whole thing, called out categories. If you were a part of that category, you crossed to the other side. Then she would ask you to come back. Now, these weren't categories like, if your favorite color is pink, cross the line. It was stuff like, if there has ever been a time when you didn't know if you had a place to stay, cross the line. Or if you've ever been forced into a sexual act, cross. It was intense. And really powerful. My hardest to watch was 'If you've ever had nothing to eat in your house for 24 hours or more, cross the line'. My hardest to walk was not having a place to stay. It was hard enough that I started crying for the first time in a public place since I was about six.

Then we went back to our groups and talked about what was hardest for us to watch and walk. Then we told everyone something we wouldn't normally tell people. Then we had to tell everyone something we wouldn't normally tell people that was FUNNY. It was an amazing way to break the solemnity without taking away from the message. However, it was still completely emotionally draining. I sort of with i could have just gone home after and cried for a few hours, but I had to go to choir, so oh well. I guess i was just meant to go to Merge and let it all out instead. Which is good because that was more a letting out of Love, than Sorrow.

I was also spending lot of my time watching some of the videos that my brother put on facebook about saving the plant and whatnot. One of them has inspired me to become a vegan unless my mom starts buying organic free-range milk products and eggs and has completely reinforced my vegetarianism. The others have inspired me to become an environmental activist and help campaign to shut down the tar sands and factories and other such huge pollutants.

But, I should probably go. All of my love to everyone. You guys are amazing in soooo many ways. I love you with all my heart. I hope some of you can also open yourselves up to the True Source, in whatever form you believe it (Allah, God, the Universe...it matters not). May Peace and Joy and Love bless you always! Bye.

And I find it kinda funny, I find it kinda sad, that all my friends are moving away from blogger land.

hahaha. myself included, unfortunately. It's kinda funny how little we all post these days. Well, one day this blog will become a travel blog and there will be een LESS posts, but the ones that come up will be So InTeNsElY EpIc that they'll pretty much blow up blogger...well, maybe not quite, but they will be pretty darn epic.

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!! I'm an evil something or other and I'm gonna eat your souls!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Bwahahahahaahahhahahaha...ha...haha.........hmmm.

This is what happens to me when I'm sick...ish. I was sicker yesterday, but now I'm getting better. Yesterday I couldn't even stand up without getting a major huge headache and blacking out for about ten seconds. It was intense. And whenever i walked i had to sort of shuffle, like i was some really old and somewhat decrepit person. it was CrAzY. So i spent all day either lying in bed or lying on the couch. And my daddy brought me ToMaTo SoUp!!!!! YAYZZ!!! He's the best dad EVER. I LoVe HiM LoTs!!

OH!!!! I can't wait for ChRiStMaS BrEaK!!!!!!!!!! Know why?!?!?!?! I'M GoInG To My BrOtHeR's HoUsE In CaNmOrE and my entire family is gonna be there!!! Both of my brothers and my sisi and my mom and my dad. and maybe even Serena's brothers and sister. WoOhOo!! It's exciting 'caus ei might be able to meet my two brothers-in-sort-of-law. HuZzAh!!!! Not to mention I get to chill out in Canmore for the whole break, and that's just fully epic 'cause I really like Canmore and i really like my brothers and Serena. So.

Ummmmm....What else is there for saying???? Well, I'm listening to classical music right now on Aol radio dealio. It's cool. Me and my sisi are the most bad ass kids in town 'cause we listen to classical music over the weekends. we blast it so loud the neighbors hear it,.....good thing it's classical so they don't mind too much, XD right now I'm listening to...well, i was listening to 3 places in New England, Third Movement: The Housatonic at Stockbridge. No wait, I AM listening to it still 'cause the little 'change song' button isn't on right now. good thing there's only a minute or so left 'cause this one is too dark and slow and weird for me right now...Oh well. I'll live. It's over now. And now I'm listening to...Symphony no. 88 in G. But I don't wanna listen to it either. so I'm gonna click the little change button and listen to...Okay, so apparently I've exceeded the number of skips allowed. XD Oh well. now I'm listening to another station. And it makes me wanna listen to Radiohead 'cause the song is called All I Need(Radiohead). So I'm not sure if that means that it's origianlly by Radiohead or what. But, now I'm gonna switch over to some InDiE RoCk!!! Woot!! Actually, I'm listening to the All Radiohead station, but whatevs.

So...I think that's about enough of my headache and extreme sleep induced ranting...Adios!!!!!

Oh yeah, I love Thom Yorke. Just sayin'. He's amazing. 'Cause Radiohead is amazing. Yeah.

I am Blood and I am Bones
I am Grass and I am Stones
I am Fire, Water too
I am Nothing without You.

I am Light yet I am Dark
I am Soft and somehow Stark
I am Timber, Leaf and Root
I am Bough and Bark and Friut.

I am every weary Stone
I am Cozened, yet Alone
I am vaulted Sky aloft
I am Ocean, rough or soft.

I am every blessed Child
I am all the Creatures, wild
I am in the Lover's arms
I am every Lover's charms.

I am all the things that Be
Things you can and cannot See
I am everywhere You are
Not too close, yet not too far.


I just made this on a sudden inspiration. Love and Peace to you all!!! Good night!!!

Yop Yo!!! Wassup, Brahs?? XD

kay, sorry for not posting sooner. I've had plenty of opportunity but I've just procrastinated and whatnot. and i was sick yesterday, bleh. but I'm better now!!! I have a pretty dang good immune system, so the longest i ever seem to be sick is about a day. hurray!

anyways, the Flogging Molly concert was FLIPPIN' AmAzInG!!!!!!!! They are soooo great live. and I got so sweaty and hot from being right in the middle of the crowd. Gah, ever since bike tour i've loved the smell of sweat. hmm....

What else has been happening? well, i got into one of the one acts. I'm a crazy kleptomaniac in cheque please. quite funny. I'm gonna steal a fork by shoving it in one of my dreads. XD

Oh yeah, i dyed my bangs red. My sisi was dying her hair red underneath and she had some extra dye, so we dyed my hair for the first time EVER. and it looks pretty good. i like red. it apparently makes my eyes like BANG!!! XD Oh Tyler, you and your analogies. XD

ummmm...So, in two days I'm going to AnOtHeR concert. this time for Marianas Trench in Red Deer. kewl shtuff. I thoroughly enjoy that band. especially their masterpiece theatres. Number ...2 i think is my favorite...or maybe 1...or 3...hmm. All of them. XD

Then on the 12th I'm going to a LoCaL CoNcErT...with a flippin' SkA BaNd!!! Gahh!! so stoked. I didn't know Alberta even had ska bands!! woohoo!! I LOVE Ska. so great.

I'm also completely addicted to two things: Radiohead and Minesweeper. woohoo!! good things, all around. XD I'm such a nerd when it comes to minesweeper. I won beginner in ten seconds. XD

Hmm, what else is going on? Oh yeah!! I'm about to put up some pictures of me on bike tour!!! woohhooooo!!!!..I miss it!!! ='( *sniffle* but, onward!

so, this was right at the beginning, in Nelson, BC. We were at this super cool market. it was great.

And this next one is at the start of a rail trail in the Slocan Valley. woohoo!! sooo beautiful.

Water water water!!! I'm pretty sure this was when we were heading out of the Slocan. good times.
This was on our second rail trail...somewhere...i can't remember which valley. XD but it was beautiful, too!!
Climbing waterfalls. that was fun. me and my brother went to the top of it and then rappelled down on a pipe. It was great.

This one is at halfway hot springs. Me and my brother drinking some geothermal mate. we put out wok full of water into the pool where the hot water was seeping out of the rocks and boiled it up for mate drinking!

Then we have some gooood foood!!! I loved making food on the road. it was all sooo yummy. I can't quite remember what we were eating here...but it was yUmMy!!

This one is me at the top of Roger's Pass, lying on the ground, laughing so hard i cried. I was expecting the pass to be sooo much worse than it was. it was more like a speed bump!!! Needless to say, what with the high altitude and the lack of oxygen (It WAS pretty high up) i went a little nutso! XD

Here's me and my brother making RAW BALLS!!!! They are soooo yummy. You mix dates, raisins, tahini, honey, carob (or cocoa) powder and whatever other nuts, seeds and berries you want then squish into a lovely mess and roll it into balls. Then you can roll the balls in coconut or flax or something, to keep them from falling apart. they are sooo good. and it's all raw, so you're not losing any of the energy by cooking stuff.

This is the RV that the German doctor who picked us up when i cut my knee was driving. Thank you to the doctor whose name i can't quite remember!!! XD

And this last is me and my family in Field. It's my dad on the far left, them Serena then Steve, then Me then my little sister. Serena's sister is taking the photo.

Yeeah, i wish i was back on tour. it was sooo much fun.

Hay, do any of you guys have Facebook? 'cause if you do, you should totally add me!!!! I'm on there as Cuppy Fox and my profile picture is sort of like the one just above, there, only my dad isn't in it and we're making funny faces. XD

but anyway, LoVe!!!!!! PeAcE!!!!! HaPpInEsS!!!!!!! GoOd TiMeS aLl ArOuNd!!!!!!! XD

Adios!!

OMG!!!! NINE DAYS!!!!!

and then i get to go to a Flogging Molly concert in Edmonton!!!!! I'M SO EXCITED!!! OUT OF MY MIND!!!!!! agh, I love their new album. and this is their first ever Canadian tour, so I'm PSYCHED. woohoo!!! Flogging Molly is one of the greatest bands EVER. and they're the first band i ever started listening to. It's great.

then in November I'm going to a Marianas Trench concert in Red Deer. That's exciting too, but not as much as Flogging Molly. XD even though they're a completely epic band. both. huzzah!! I'm so psyched for this!!!

Peace and Love!!!!